The Power that's Higher than My Busy Mind

One of my new favorite blogs has given me lots to think about this morning. Yesterday, when I read this from Amanda at Priceless Pearls, I had just been noticing how I may be in danger of staying on a path that isn’t the correct one for me, personally, or this blog.

I am mulling subject matter, editing things to death, and reading and commenting on way too many other blogs. I enjoy it, but it’s starting to feel mandatory, when maybe I should just be taking a real walk, instead of treading too boldly on a path where I could easily neglect the things in my life that are most precious. Getting wrapped up in self promotion has always felt like eating dirt to me; maybe I’m going to stop working quite so hard at something that’s painful. I question what category does this blog belong in, and feel bad that it doesn’t easily fit in one, instead of remembering that I have always defied categorization; and that this, although sometimes difficult, is a good thing, for the simple reason I am what I am. Familiar feelings of inadequacy seep in. I want to cocoon and gestate. I want to brainstorm and not use full sentences. I want to be blessed with words I will look back on, and have that amazing feeling of “who wrote this,” and understand that it isn’t about me at all. Letter-sized legal pad with blue Uni-ball Vision poised in left hand, legs tucked under me in my favorite chair; I will become my own desert island, writing whatever comes, instead of just whatever comes to mind.

This morning when I sat down at my desk to work on two blogs I had drafted yesterday, they had been eaten by Blogger. I imagine this Blogger dude to look a lot like that greedy and mindless Pac Man. These two blogs had it all going on: they were timely, insightful and had me laughing at my own funnies. (I only can tell you these things with such boldness, since apparently they will never be seen again, even by me.) So then I went back to Priceless Pearls, because I had a feeling that there was even more wisdom somewhere in Amanda’s post. Turns out the message was in her new post, about how many of the modern conveniences in her life have broken in the past couple of days:

“So, when it all boils down to it, there is always a solution, always a way to get done the necessities. It is only a matter of perspective, I have come to learn. There is a joy actually, in learning to do things differently, when the things we take so for granted, are no longer available/working. So, instead of leaning on mod cons, I learn to lean on Him “

So, here’s to a great Wednesday. I better post this before Pac Man finds it.