Aloha Gratuitous Show My Dog Off Friday
Lily and I have been going to a dog trainer for the past few weeks and she has made remarkable progress. According to our trainer, Stretch (his legal name), what I learn is much more important than what Lily learns. I have to be the alpha.
The truth is, I’ve been spending much of my life thinking I’m a natural “alpha,” when in reality I am not. I’m more like a Bossy Yorkie, who strides up to great danes as if I am head wolf. I don’t realize I’m short and all, until I have my head bitten off by the larger specimen. I figure this out only after I’ve already stepped out a little too far to turn back unnoticed. And people, I’ve got nothing. So I revert to being a wimpy chihuahua. I’m speaking figuratively here. I not talking about physical size or dogs.
Which leads me to the subject I worked with my life coach, Tonya, on during our last session: How I let my adolescent/teenage daughters work me. As of recently, I’m afraid of them- seriously, terrified. I react by trying to make everything okay. In my attempts to smooth out the un-smoothable, I accommodate things I shouldn’t, and end up taking responsibility or offense, when perhaps I should have just gone and gotten a milkshake. I didn’t use the dog analogy with Tonya, but as I see it, I am Chihuahua Mom.
I’ve known since my daughters were babies that one of the challenges of raising two strong girls is that much energy will be spent just trying to prevent them from taking over the family. Recently I’ve hit a wall, because now there seems to be a serious threat that they may already hate me. And the last thing any Chiauhua Mom wants is for her children to hate her.
I pretty sure this is a bigger hurdle than last week’s milkshake incident.
So I figure since I don’t have a teenage trainer for my human adolescents, but I do have a trainer for my canine teenager – what better place to start than with Lily? Stretch advocates the use of training collars on dogs, but I just want to clarify that using such a device is definitely not recommended for use on human teenagers.Yesterday, I commented on Ann’s Rants: Confessions of a Work Week Widow that perhaps Ann should crate train her toddler, to keep him from crib vaulting. Even though I was joking when I wrote it, I started to see the possibility of the technique as the next trend in childrearing. Note: I see no possibility for this same transfer to humanity with training collars.
If you are reading this and offended, Chihuahua Mom says, “Please don’t hate me!” Yorkie Mom says, “I’m still just kidding!”
At today’s training session with Stretch, I was so alpha, I was practically zen. I did my thing and Lily followed along with little more than verbal correction. I made no eye contact. I didn’t bend to her will, which man, I could so feel. I was decisive. I was one kick arse Yorkie.
This is a picture of Lily with Stretch. Sorry it’s kind of blurry, but doesn’t Stretch look like a streched-out piece of gum?
So my Aloha Friday question for you today is: Have you ever raised dogs? Teenagers? Any training tricks or advice? Jokes?
Here’s my answer: Lily is 9 mos. and the best advice I have so far is to seriously consider crate training. Because we had to be so consistent with it – and I dislike consistency – I’ll admit it was challenging. Lily hated it at first, and I wondered if maybe she just wasn’t a crate-training kind of girl. I didn’t want her to hate me! She likes her crate so much now and is an easy and happy dog. Learning to “come?” That’s a whole other story.
For more Aloha Friday questions or to participate head over to An Island Life!
I have a dog and we’ve taken him to puppy classes and then an intermediate level training class. So far he hasn’t retained anything that we’ve taught him and we haven’t retained anything that the dog trainers have taught us!
My dog was already really sweet when we got her, and she is so submissive that training was easy. But! I did read Ceasar Milan’s book about training, and a lot of what he said made sense. You might want to look through it.
I have both & all I can say is it's a total learning process! I'm still not certain who is teaching whom! lol
Lily is just beautiful!! I have no tips for you as we didn’t train our miniature poodles except to walk on a leash. Other than that, they had the run of the house! *L*
I can’t say I’ve ever raised a dog or a teenager, but I have watched quite a lot of The Dog Whisperer, and it sounds like you’re headed in the right direction.
So no eye contact with dogs is how you move into alpha slot? And yet, with teens, eye contact is important to establish authority, no?
psych mommy, I've kind of noticed that we could easily end up doing the same things every week indefinitely.
sassafras, I have seen Cesar's show, but haven't checked out his book yet. Thanks!
sues2u2, So true!
ECW, Thanks!
Shawn, I love that show! My family thought I was nuts last summer, when I watched it obsessively along with It's Me or the Dog BEFORE I even had a dog.
Phd yogurt, It's me who has to be careful with the eye contact. I'm a little transparent and a soft touch for facial manipulations both human and canine. :>}
i haven’t had the pleasure of training either yet.
No experience with teenagers – my dd is only 15 months. However we do have 2 dogs and had 3 up until 2 years ago. The dogs and dd are all spoiled, but they are mostly good so I can’t complain. Can’t really say they’ve been formally trained. We more go with the flow and work with their personalities.
I’ve done the doggie training (twice) now. I’m for sure the alpha in the house, but it’s exhausting.
i love crate training. it’s done wonders for our home
I have a dog and a teenager. The dog is much better behaved. He’s crate-trained, but it wasn’t until he actually ATE his first crate that we realized he needed metal, not plastic.
He’s a good boy now.
My daughter won’t stay in her crate.
Freakin’ A? Are we the same person? I totally get the Chihuahua Mom vs. the Yorkie Mom! That’s me too.
Love your Labradoodle. That is absolutely the most precious dog!
I’ve got nothing re: dogs or teenagers… all my advice comes from Cesar the Dog Whisperer!
Hey Margo, thanks for ‘following’ my blog! I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. I look forward to reading your blog as well. It’s always great to meet new people. And your dog is great!
God bless and happy blogging!
I have raised dogs and a teenager – Dogs are by far easier…
I have no idea how I have survived each…
Lily’s Mama won an award at A Novel Menagerie.
http://anovelmenagerie.com/ghost/2009/03/21/the-sunday-salon-giveaways/
Sheri
Jaime, You potentially have many of life’s biggest thrills ahead. And I mean that in a good way
Buffie, Dd and your dog’s sound awesome… And like you’re having fun. thanks for stopping by!
Sheri, as an alpha “mean to be,” and from what I’ve learned about you from your blog, have no doubt you are Alpha. I’ll remember Sheri Alpha agrees on the crate next time I’m tempted to let Lily sleep in our room. (I may post pictures later from the disaster!)
Vic, I can’t get over what dog’s can actually eat. Fortunately our crate is reinforced zoo grade steel. I guess it’s a good thing I resisted that cute faux wicker one.
Laurie, thanks for stopping by, I always love meeting fellow “mutts”.
Lilu, I love that thing Cesar says at the beginning of his show, “I rehabilitate dogs. I train people.” Gives me hope for both dog and teens!
Matt, thanks for stopping by, I look forward to reading your blog as well.
NateandJakesmom, child raising was definitely good prep for puppy raising. Not sure how it would have worked in reverse around here
Thanks again, Sheri! xxx ooo
Margo, thanks so much for the shout-out! Margo is such a pretty name, BTW. You were on to something, and part of me wishes I’d kept him in the crib and gotten one of those covers that keep them from vaulting–essentially crating him. Then again, I’d just be prolonging the inevitable Running Of The Boy we’re experiencing now. I’m not much of a pet person, but my parents crate their doodle with much success-and she was a wild woman!!
Margo, thanks so much for the shout-out! Margo is such a pretty name, BTW. You were on to something, and part of me wishes I’d kept him in the crib and gotten one of those covers that keep them from vaulting–essentially crating him. Then again, I’d just be prolonging the inevitable Running Of The Boy we’re experiencing now. I’m not much of a pet person, but my parents crate their doodle with much success-and she was a wild woman!!
Stretch gave up on Dudley, btw, after he bolted out of the yard, across the street, and under the neighbor’s joggling board. Glad it’s going better for Miss Lily!