Today’s Physics/Driving/Life Lesson: Everybody, Accelerate
I think that the last week of school my daughters should spring out of bed in enthusiasm. After all, another school year is coming to a close. Aren’t there exams to study for, yearbooks to sign and field days to get that adrenaline pumping? Instead the mornings around here feel like the darkest mornings of December. Their bodies remain flung immobile in their beds as if already on summer break. Alarm clocks and several personal wake up calls don’t do it.
I’ve resorted to yelling out something from my own half awake stupor that formerly has been reserved for saying when stoplights turn green.
“Everybody accelerate!”
My theory is that if everybody just accelerated as soon as a stoplight turned green or alarm clock turns 7, there would be no more traffic. If everybody just makes the smallest movement to get out of bed, and keeps doing that, making one movement after another, hooking on to the energy of me and my minivan, or just me, depending on whether talking about intersections or morning routines, enough momentum will be gained to self sustain. Mornings where one has to go to zero to 50 in such a short time frame would become a thing of the past. There would be plenty of time for corn flakes and kisses. Teeth, instead of being gnashed are brushed.
Given all the drivers out there who don’t know the “everybody accelerate rule,” the first thing to learn is that taking advantage of holding the leading position at a stoplight is key. Imagine the first car at a stoplight as the engine of a train.
The saavy accelerator knows that a fresh green light signals it is time for no more or less than a slow steady departure from the intersection. Like a freight engine for CSX you are a leader, and without strong assertive movement, no one else will follow.
Rubber is not laid. Contrary to what the uninitiated might say, you are not racing. When things go wel,l all cars stay equal distance from each other. Acceleration happens in perfect unison.
Times when your assumed power is heeded will be rare, but if you remain constant, small victories will come. Mostly, you will watch the others diminish in the rear view mirror. It is important not to speed at this point – remember strong, steady acceleration – but instead relax and enjoy the feeling of knowing lessons are being learned.
Don’t dare look over at them at the next stoplight a mile or two down the road when they ease in beside or behind you as if to say, “Look where that got you hot shot!”
This is where I want to tell them that if weren’t for me and my astute knowledge of optimum traffic technique, they might not have even made that last stoplight. Then, as the “everyone accelerate” rule becomes more and more widely practiced, the stoplights would be timed differently, allowing our tandem forward momentum to continue. But instead of rolling down the window and lecturing, I simply take advantage of my opportunity role model acceptable acceleration again.
On any given day, I have my fair share of second or worse positions at stoplights. What to do then? Even though I am tempted to feel as if I am trapped behind drivers who suck my freedom like marrow from bone, it’s best to take a deep breath and reject any negativity. Truth be told, mostly I lose patience and lay rubber.
So I have a doctor’s appointment in 30 minutes. I am in my pajamas and blogging. I haven’t eaten breakfast. Still, a I think there is still time for me to make it, without resorting to mayhem. I say to myself, “Everybody, accelerate.”
While I certainly agree with the life metaphor, I would not PHYSICALLY try that in Texas.
You’ll run headfirst into all the folks who ran the red.
Maybe there’s a life metaphor in there, too…
I agree about the leadership position at the stoplights… if all drivers were like us traffic blockages would be a distant memory. Now if we could just get people to put in their brains when they left the house, also… OMG what a world it would be!
Would be very nice if we could get people to use their brains a little more
Excellent
Yep I agree. Wish people were more alert and positive in traffic and also life in general. All the best for your medical appointment
I am glad that you are fixing the world for me. It’s got to be work. No wonder you’re still in your jammies!
What drives me NUTS are the people in front of me who deliberately slow down when approaching a green light intersection, come almost to a stop, and then suddenly accelerate through right as the light turns red, so that I’m stuck behind for another entire cycle. Grrr.
What drives me NUTS are the people in front of me who deliberately slow down when approaching a green light intersection, come almost to a stop, and then suddenly accelerate through right as the light turns red, so that I’m stuck behind for another entire cycle. Grrr.
Boy, do I agree!!! Very good point. It should be taught in schools. [wink] If anyone is ever behind me, you'll not be waiting on me to move, and I don't "lay down rubber" either. I GO!
)
Hope you made the doctors appointment in time.
I love the concept, but those people who refuse to press on the gas really irk me to death! There is always somebody who is texting or putting on lipstick while the rest of us are dodging their pokey *sses.
Hope you got there in time.
The closer we get to the end of school, the slower and whinier my kids are. Who am I kidding? Me too.
"Accelerate" is a great motto! Mine's "Momentum".
you sound like my hubby … he times the lights and knows exactly when they will turn. I'm just late everywhere and I'm starting to accept it! lol